Every hospitality manager knows the feeling. A staff member is underperforming — showing up late, cutting corners on prep, creating tension in the team — and you know you need to say something. But the thought of that conversation sits in your stomach like a bad meal.
You put it off. You drop hints. You roster them differently. And the problem gets worse.
Performance conversations are the most avoided management task in professional kitchens. They're also the most important. Get them right and you build a stronger team. Get them wrong and you lose a staff member, damage morale, or expose yourself to a Fair Work complaint.
This guide is for Australian hospitality managers who want to handle performance conversations professionally, calmly, and effectively — without the drama that too often follows.
Why Kitchen Performance Conversations Feel Different
A kitchen is not a corporate office. The environment is high pressure, physically demanding, and emotionally charged. Staff work in close proximity under intense time pressure. Relationships are built fast and broken fast. The culture is direct — sometimes brutally so.
This creates a specific challenge for performance conversations. In a kitchen, feedback often happens in the moment — a sharp word during service, a correction barked across the pass. That's normal and necessary during a busy shift. But it's not a performance conversation. It's reactive management.
A genuine performance conversation is planned, private, calm, and constructive. It's the opposite of what most kitchen managers are trained to do — because most kitchen managers were never trained at all. They were promoted because they were good cooks, not because they were good leaders.
Before the Conversation: The Preparation That Makes Everything Easier
The biggest mistake managers make is walking into a performance conversation unprepared. Preparation takes 15 minutes and changes everything.
Document Specific Incidents
Vague feedback is useless feedback. "Your attitude has been poor lately" achieves nothing. "On Tuesday the 12th, you arrived 20 minutes late without notifying anyone, and on Thursday the 14th, the mise en place for your section was incomplete at service start" is specific, factual, and actionable.
Before any performance conversation, write down three to five specific incidents with dates, times, and observable facts. Not interpretations. Not feelings. Facts.
Separate the Person From the Behaviour
The staff member is not a bad person. They are exhibiting behaviours that are creating problems. "You're unreliable" is an attack on character. "You've been late three times in the past fortnight" is an observation about behaviour. One creates defensiveness. The other creates the possibility of change.
Know What Outcome You Want
Before you sit down, decide what success looks like. Are you trying to correct a specific behaviour and keep the staff member? Issue a formal warning? Understand an underlying issue? Begin a managed exit? The conversation looks different depending on the answer.
Check Your Own Emotional State
If you're angry, frustrated, or exhausted — wait. A performance conversation held in the wrong emotional state almost always makes things worse. If that means scheduling for tomorrow morning rather than tonight after a difficult service, that's the right call.
The Structure: How to Run the Conversation
Step 1: Set the Tone Immediately
The first 60 seconds determine whether this conversation will be productive or defensive. Start direct without being aggressive.
"I've asked you to come in because I want to talk about some things I've noticed over the past few weeks. I want to have an honest conversation and I want to hear your perspective. This isn't about getting you in trouble — it's about making sure we're both on the same page."
Step 2: State the Specific Behaviours
Present your documented incidents clearly and factually. One at a time. Without editorialising. Then stop talking. Give the staff member space to respond.
Step 3: Listen — Actually Listen
This is where most managers fail. Listen to understand, not to respond. Ask questions: "Can you help me understand what happened on Tuesday?" or "Is there something going on outside of work that's affecting things?"
You might discover the lateness is because of a changed bus schedule. You might discover a personal crisis affecting performance. None of this excuses the behaviour — but it changes how you respond to it.
Step 4: Be Clear About the Standard
After listening, restate the standard clearly. Not as a threat — as a clarification. Be specific. Leave no room for "I didn't know that was expected."
Step 5: Agree on a Path Forward
A performance conversation without a clear next step is just a complaint. End with a specific, agreed plan and get verbal agreement. Then document it.
Step 6: Document the Conversation
After the conversation, write a brief summary — date, time, who was present, what was discussed, what was agreed. Send a follow-up email to the staff member summarising the conversation and agreed expectations. This creates clarity and protects you under Fair Work if further action is required.
The Scenarios That Make It Harder
The Staff Member Gets Emotional
Tears, anger, or shutting down — all common responses. If a staff member becomes visibly distressed, pause and acknowledge it. "I can see this is difficult. Take a moment." If they're too distressed to continue productively, reschedule. Never push through a conversation with someone who is too emotional to engage.
The Staff Member Denies Everything
This is why documentation matters. Calmly refer to your notes. "I understand you see it differently. What I have noted is that on Tuesday the 12th at 9:20am, you arrived 20 minutes after your rostered start time." Don't argue. State the facts. Move forward.
The Staff Member Turns It Around on You
Acknowledge their concerns without letting the conversation derail. "I hear that you have concerns about that and I'm happy to discuss it separately. Right now I want to focus on what we've talked about today." Then follow through — actually schedule that separate conversation.
The High Performer Having a Bad Patch
Lead with curiosity rather than correction. "I've noticed things have been different for you lately and I wanted to check in. You're one of the strongest people on this team and I want to make sure you're okay." The performance issues are the symptom. Find the cause.
What Australian Law Requires You to Know
This section is general information only and does not constitute legal advice. For specific situations, consult a qualified employment lawyer or contact the Fair Work Ombudsman.
Under the Fair Work Act 2009, employees who have completed the minimum employment period are protected from unfair dismissal. To defend a performance-based termination, you need to demonstrate the employee was made aware of concerns, given a reasonable opportunity to improve, and that the decision was not harsh, unjust, or unreasonable.
Key practical takeaways:
- Always document performance conversations in writing
- Give staff a reasonable timeframe to improve before escalating
- Follow a consistent process across your team
- If moving toward formal warnings or termination, seek HR or legal advice first
The Follow-Up: Where Most Managers Drop the Ball
A performance conversation without follow-up is worse than no conversation at all. Set a specific review point — two to four weeks. At that point, have a brief follow-up conversation.
If things have improved, acknowledge it explicitly. "I've noticed a real difference over the past few weeks — punctuality has been great and the feedback from the team has been positive. I appreciate the effort."
If things haven't improved, the next conversation is more formal. Consistency here is everything. If you have the conversation and don't follow up, you've taught your team that performance conversations are theatre — uncomfortable but ultimately meaningless.
Building a Kitchen Culture Where Performance Conversations Are Normal
The best kitchen managers don't have difficult performance conversations because they have frequent easy ones. They give feedback constantly — specific, timely, and balanced between correction and recognition. By the time a formal performance conversation is needed, it doesn't feel like an ambush because the staff member already knows where they stand.
That culture doesn't happen by accident. It's built deliberately, one conversation at a time. The performance conversation you've been avoiding is the first brick.
Key Takeaways
- Prepare with specific, documented incidents before any performance conversation
- Separate the person from the behaviour — address facts, not character
- Listen genuinely — context changes how you respond
- Be clear about the standard and agree on a specific path forward
- Document every conversation in writing and follow up at an agreed time
- Under Fair Work, documented performance management protects both you and your staff member
- Frequent small feedback conversations reduce the need for difficult formal ones
0 comments